RebKell's Junkie Boards
Board Junkies Forums
 
Log in Register FAQ Memberlist Search RebKell's Junkie Boards Forum Index

Iyanla: Fix My Hoop Star Life (Chamique Holdsclaw) 8.17.13
Goto page 1, 2  Next
 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    RebKell's Junkie Boards Forum Index » WNBA
View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
Genero36



Joined: 24 Apr 2005
Posts: 9473



Back to top
PostPosted: 08/10/13 9:08 pm    ::: Iyanla: Fix My Hoop Star Life (Chamique Holdsclaw) 8.17.13 Reply Reply with quote

Also, Holdsclaw will be on Iyanla: Fix My Life next week (8.17.13 @ 9 pm on the Oprah Winfrey Network). It's going to be DRAMA!

<embed><iframe width="640" height="360" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/cDWg_Ovy1xg?feature=player_embedded" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></embed>




Last edited by Genero36 on 08/17/13 7:58 pm; edited 2 times in total
zune69



Joined: 27 May 2010
Posts: 7366



Back to top
PostPosted: 08/10/13 9:16 pm    ::: Reply Reply with quote



Genero36



Joined: 24 Apr 2005
Posts: 9473



Back to top
PostPosted: 08/10/13 9:18 pm    ::: Reply Reply with quote

zune69 wrote:


That's my reaction to Steve Francis. He doesn't look too good.


Genero36



Joined: 24 Apr 2005
Posts: 9473



Back to top
PostPosted: 08/10/13 9:28 pm    ::: Reply Reply with quote



Holdsclaw's mom is in the middle in tears.


zune69



Joined: 27 May 2010
Posts: 7366



Back to top
PostPosted: 08/10/13 9:30 pm    ::: Reply Reply with quote

Genero36 wrote:
zune69 wrote:


That's my reaction to Steve Francis. He doesn't look too good.


Exactly.Sometimes it's best to just stay off camera.Get your life straight without publicizing it.I understand that they feel some people will draw some inspiration from it.But...







PhoenixxLily
I Voted


Joined: 17 Aug 2010
Posts: 3909
Location: South Carolina, United States, North America, Earth


Back to top
PostPosted: 08/10/13 10:05 pm    ::: Reply Reply with quote

i don't like any of this. iyanla is so well loved especially among black folks. (for context reference, i am a black female) she's wonderful. she's no nonsense. she helps and knows her stuff. ok... i've seen her shows and there are moments when it's like damn, you got these people together. you're such a help. but for me... there is always a huge BUT.

i don't trust her. she makes me nervous.

i have bi polar disorder diagnosed in 2002. i'm now 27, but the early spring of 2001 is when all of my issues came fully to a head and i bottomed out. i began psychiatric treatment then. i can tell you honestly and fully that since 2001 i have experienced every kind of doctor, nurse, therapist, and mental health tech you can imagine. every spectrum of the competence, knowledge, and personality scale.

here's the reason iyanla makes me nervous. when your mind is unwell you are extremely vulnerable. to everyone and everything including yourself. you are ultimately at the mercy of forces that you can't control. the relationship between any sort of mental health professional and the patient is one that is fragile and highly important. it can literally mean the difference between life and death. and when you deal with people like us, the mentally ill, death can and often does come at our own hands. when you go in to visit a psychiatrist or a therapist for the very first visit it is not like going in to see a general doctor. whether or not you like that doctor may determine if you still see them, but often it doesn't. you generally will still see them and take their advice even if you don't care for them. what i'm saying is, the general doctor's personality and relatability doesn't affect your treatment. only his competence matters. that is inherently not so when you're dealing with mental health. this is often overlooked and not fully understood by the general public. the mind is a hard thing to understand which makes the very simple reason for this hard to accept. psychiatric treatment relies heavily on the patient liking their care provider. and trusting them. you can't trust someone you don't like, and you can't like someone you don't trust. is it starting to make sense? if you have none of those things you aren't inclined to open up and be honest in those sessions. you have to open up the deepest darkest parts of yourself, expose yourself to someone else. if you don't you can't be helped. let me tell you it's so much easier said than done. i have left countless therapy sessions very weak both physically and mentally and quite raw emotionally. that's what we go through just to get "better". good mental health care providers can see through the bullshit that you give them. but it does no good if the patient isn't receptive to the advice and treatment they're given and if they aren't completely honest thus providing a bigger picture of what's wrong. you see, if you go to your general doctor for the very first time and you're not quite sure about him, your logical response is to continue to see him... maybe you'll click later. maybe you won't but you'll still see him. it doesn't work that way with mental patients. if the patient and the doctor/therapist don't click on that FIRST visit treatment will not work. i know in 10 to 15 minutes i like the person sitting across from me and want treatment from them. if it's not there it won't work. you won't open up and share, you won't accept advice and treatment, nothing happens. going to someone you don't like only makes things worse because it confirms in your mind that there is no help, there is no one, and nothing will ever change. this is also why it's highly important for a sick person to have a good support system around them to urge them to continue treatment even if it's with doctor after doctor. eventually you will find the right one.

there have been times in my short life where my therapist was my only friend and confidant. there was no one else to care about me and to watch out for me. in that moment i was basically at their whims. lots of power on just one side. that relationship is a unique and very strong bond. it's almost like that of a parent and child. if it ends suddenly or improperly that can be very traumatizing even dangerous. i have personally gone through that twice. i almost didn't make it. keep in mind, every time you see someone new, even though they might have your records, you still have to go through your past with them so that they can see you as you are now. you have to once again tell someone all about you. that's very hard. in order to get well you are constantly reopening old wounds. it's a hard world to live in. but that is my world and i share it with millions of others chamique included.

that is the background so you have reference. this is why i distrust iyanla. she is a tv personality. i don't know her personally so know i can't fully question her motives. she very well may do this for the love of helping others and be sincere. but, she comes in with her camera crews and producers and is only there for a few days. then she is gone. it starts a process but does not see it through. and then, what process does it start? say chamique bonds with iyanla. then what? she's gone again. it all seems so well and clear and then right back in that darkness. alone. is she strong enough to say hey, this can work let me work through and find someone to seek help from. or does she quickly slip back into the before? that seems more likely because not only is the savior gone, she has publicly exposed herself when normally no one else would have to see that. she's hit with reality when she's least likely to be able to handle it. this type of "help" i feel is exploitation. iyanla shows how wonderful she is, then her books and seminars sell. she makes more money. yes, she shows help is out there and maybe she even helps herself. but at what cost? you have to remember this is a tv show first and foremost. you've got to show all the dirt and drama and nicely conclude it with, "the person is all fixed and on their way". that's not how it works. you can push someone too fast to face things they don't want to face or aren't ready to face. i've personally experienced that and the results were disastrous. in fact, at the current time, i have a permanent block on the issue. i won't talk about it or even attempt to work through it. i push it so far down and do my best to ignore it. even though i think of it almost constantly and i can see how badly it's affecting me. because i was pushed too fast, that is scarier than the now. i just live with it. then there's iyanla's personality. the strong way she judges and is "mean" when people don't immediately do as she says. huge red flag i recognize all too well.

i don't like this at all. and i sincerely hope chamique comes out of this better or not to badly damaged. i don't even know what iyanla's credentials are other than "experience in life" and "self help". that matters alot.

sorry this is so long but i had to share my thoughts.



_________________
the Few. the Proud. Nursing Students
Tumblr: http://phoenixxlily.tumblr.com
Buy My Book: http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/NadiyahWalton843
Genero36



Joined: 24 Apr 2005
Posts: 9473



Back to top
PostPosted: 08/10/13 10:22 pm    ::: Reply Reply with quote

Lily,

Thank you for sharing your story. I suffer from anxiety depression and am aware of what the mental health community faces on a daily basis. It takes one moment to trigger a whole set of emotions that can make us want to do something dangerous to ourselves.

As for Iyanla. She isn't a licensed therapist.

Her resume:

Education:
Medgar Evers College, BA, public administration, summa cum laude, 1983; City University of New York, JD, 1988;
University of Santa Monica, MA, spiritual psychology, 2001.

Career
Public defender, Philadelphia, 1988-92;
Ordained Yoruba priestess, 1983;
Founder and President of Inner Visions Spiritual Life Maintenance Center and Bookstore, Silver Springs, Maryland, 1988-;
Author, 1992-;
Ordained a gospel minister, 1997,
Talk show host, ABC, 2001.

She'll tell you that it's not about the cameras and production crew. It's her ministry to help others. She's gotten into about this exact point with a few of the people she's had on her show.

<embed><iframe width="640" height="360" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/aI7QetCbb-0?feature=player_detailpage" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></embed>

<embed><iframe width="640" height="360" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/SMpBI7sEC7c?feature=player_detailpage" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></embed>


missjoy28



Joined: 01 Sep 2005
Posts: 6107
Location: Chicago, IL


Back to top
PostPosted: 08/10/13 10:24 pm    ::: Reply Reply with quote

Ok,I'm late on this.But what happened to Chamique? Confused



_________________
EDD for President!
Genero36



Joined: 24 Apr 2005
Posts: 9473



Back to top
PostPosted: 08/10/13 10:28 pm    ::: Reply Reply with quote

<embed><iframe width="640" height="360" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/hUkF9xiVg5Q?feature=player_detailpage" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></embed>


Genero36



Joined: 24 Apr 2005
Posts: 9473



Back to top
PostPosted: 08/10/13 10:32 pm    ::: Reply Reply with quote

missjoy28 wrote:
Ok,I'm late on this.But what happened to Chamique? Confused


http://boards.rebkell.net/viewtopic.php?t=74260&highlight=chamique

http://boards.rebkell.net/viewtopic.php?t=71738&highlight=chamique


PhoenixxLily
I Voted


Joined: 17 Aug 2010
Posts: 3909
Location: South Carolina, United States, North America, Earth


Back to top
PostPosted: 08/10/13 10:32 pm    ::: Reply Reply with quote

still don't trust her. that resume only makes me distrust her even more. does it make her an effective person? that is, can she be a light to those around her personally? yes. but should she be taking on people and situations like this? in the role of a therapist? no. experience and gained knowledge from life and your own personal views goes a long way. yes it does.

but if she truly wanted to have this helping ministry in the way she speaks of it, she should have at some point at least taken psychology classes. you have to learn the fine details of the mind, how it is supposed to work, before you can go around correcting it when it's broken. you have to know the finer points of human behavior. and by that i mean you have to study it. get a degree. just knowing all about it or going through something yourself isn't good enough. and another problem i have with iyanla and many other doctors i've come into contact with, is the fact that she fails to realize that she is not the expert on disorders or problems. her "patients" are. and they always will be because they're the ones actually going through it. that's knowledge you can't learn in a book. a book will get you close but not all the way there.

i really respect Dr. Drew, because even though he goes around on tv he doesn't live there like iyanla does. and he's a real doctor. if you ever watch celebrity rehab that's the real deal. i've been committed enough times to recognize a facility when i see one. that's not staged for tv drama. that's how it is "on the inside". those people.. yeah. i've met them. he's studied what he teaches and if i'm not mistaken i think he has personal experience with substance abuse in some manner on top of it. that's the fine difference between the two. Dr. Drew is a real professional that should be helping people. Iyanla isn't and should be very careful with what she does. and so should the people that look to her for help.



_________________
the Few. the Proud. Nursing Students
Tumblr: http://phoenixxlily.tumblr.com
Buy My Book: http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/NadiyahWalton843
Genero36



Joined: 24 Apr 2005
Posts: 9473



Back to top
PostPosted: 08/10/13 10:37 pm    ::: Reply Reply with quote

LilyJadeRose wrote:
still don't trust her. that resume only makes me distrust her even more. does it make her an effective person? that is, can she be a light to those around her personally? yes. but should she be taking on people and situations like this? in the role of a therapist? no. experience and gained knowledge from life and your own personal views goes a long way. yes it does.

but if she truly wanted to have this helping ministry in the way she speaks of it, she should have at some point at least taken psychology classes. you have to learn the fine details of the mind, how it is supposed to work, before you can go around correcting it when it's broken. you have to know the finer points of human behavior. and by that i mean you have to study it. get a degree. just knowing all about it or going through something yourself isn't good enough. and another problem i have with iyanla and many other doctors i've come into contact with, is the fact that she fails to realize that she is not the expert on disorders or problems. her "patients" are. and they always will be because they're the ones actually going through it. that's knowledge you can't learn in a book. a book will get you close but not all the way there.

i really respect Dr. Drew, because even though he goes around on tv he doesn't live there like iyanla does. and he's a real doctor. if you ever watch celebrity rehab that's the real deal. i've been committed enough times to recognize a facility when i see one. that's not staged for tv drama. that's how it is "on the inside". those people.. yeah. i've met them. he's studied what he teaches and if i'm not mistaken i think he has personal experience with substance abuse in some manner on top of it. that's the fine difference between the two. Dr. Drew is a real professional that should be helping people. Iyanla isn't and should be very careful with what she does. and so should the people that look to her for help.


To be fair, Dr. Drew has received his fair share of criticism for exploiting celebrities for ratings with cameras.

<embed><iframe width="640" height="360" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/Nk9tSmkWcxo?feature=player_detailpage" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></embed>


PhoenixxLily
I Voted


Joined: 17 Aug 2010
Posts: 3909
Location: South Carolina, United States, North America, Earth


Back to top
PostPosted: 08/10/13 10:44 pm    ::: Reply Reply with quote

point taken in regards to Dr. Drew. it's also fair, reasonable, and necessary to be suspicious of him as well. but when you start the analyzing process... one definitely outweighs the other as far as "trust factor" goes.



_________________
the Few. the Proud. Nursing Students
Tumblr: http://phoenixxlily.tumblr.com
Buy My Book: http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/NadiyahWalton843
Genero36



Joined: 24 Apr 2005
Posts: 9473



Back to top
PostPosted: 08/10/13 10:47 pm    ::: Reply Reply with quote

LilyJadeRose wrote:
point taken in regards to Dr. Drew. it's also fair, reasonable, and necessary to be suspicious of him as well. but when you start the analyzing process... one definitely outweighs the other as far as "trust factor" goes.


I understand completely.


Genero36



Joined: 24 Apr 2005
Posts: 9473



Back to top
PostPosted: 08/11/13 9:27 am    ::: Reply Reply with quote

Lily,

I have a feeling that you won't like what Iyanla says at 18 seconds.


<embed><iframe width="640" height="360" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/cDWg_Ovy1xg?feature=player_detailpage" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></embed>


missjoy28



Joined: 01 Sep 2005
Posts: 6107
Location: Chicago, IL


Back to top
PostPosted: 08/11/13 11:19 am    ::: Reply Reply with quote

Ok,I'm late on this.But what happened to Chamique? Confused



_________________
EDD for President!
missjoy28



Joined: 01 Sep 2005
Posts: 6107
Location: Chicago, IL


Back to top
PostPosted: 08/11/13 11:21 am    ::: Reply Reply with quote

LOL,sorry for the double post!



_________________
EDD for President!
missjoy28



Joined: 01 Sep 2005
Posts: 6107
Location: Chicago, IL


Back to top
PostPosted: 08/11/13 11:30 am    ::: Reply Reply with quote

Genero36 wrote:
missjoy28 wrote:
Ok,I'm late on this.But what happened to Chamique? Confused


http://boards.rebkell.net/viewtopic.php?t=74260&highlight=chamique

http://boards.rebkell.net/viewtopic.php?t=71738&highlight=chamique


WOW! Shocked Thanks for the story!Chamique needs to get some serious help to deal with her mental issues.Glad that Lacy isn't hurt.We need to p4ay for Mique and hope she can turn her life around!



_________________
EDD for President!
PhoenixxLily
I Voted


Joined: 17 Aug 2010
Posts: 3909
Location: South Carolina, United States, North America, Earth


Back to top
PostPosted: 08/11/13 5:06 pm    ::: Reply Reply with quote

Genero36 wrote:
Lily,

I have a feeling that you won't like what Iyanla says at 18 seconds.



no. i didn't. i don't need to see the rest of what happened. that actually was what i was describing earlier. i gather this one is the "confrontation" sit down with the mother? yeah, that's some shit you seriously plan out and make sure both people even want to do it in the first place. that's what i meant when i said doing things too fast, when people weren't ready (and that applies to those around the patient as well) and doing them improperly. that is the horror i was speaking of. what was the damage done by that? since it's tv i'm gonna assume they get it together and make it happen for the cameras. but i guarantee you chamique never forgets that first reaction. it will stick with her and come up again later and it won't be good. to what degree who's to say. that's exactly how it was for me. and that's how it was for the others... you never forget the people you've been in the hospital with. you may forget their names but you'll remember them and their stories. we actually bond with each other in there and it's necessary because it helps you deal with being locked away. that first reaction to a family conference is important and if it's poor, that is never forgotten. it does come up later though how and to what level varies from each person. i've lived it and i've seen it. that's why this shit isn't a game. need to know what the hell you're doing.

20 seconds and it was so hard to watch. i refuse to watch her show anyway, but i definitely won't be watching this one. i wish chamique had had someone positive and sensible around her to have seriously talked her out of doing this. or gone full stop to prevent it. i have those people in my corner. and i thank the gods each day for them



_________________
the Few. the Proud. Nursing Students
Tumblr: http://phoenixxlily.tumblr.com
Buy My Book: http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/NadiyahWalton843
Genero36



Joined: 24 Apr 2005
Posts: 9473



Back to top
PostPosted: 08/15/13 3:28 pm    ::: Reply Reply with quote

Mique seems medicated in this clip.

<embed><iframe width="640" height="360" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/BNBxJ_slHL4?feature=player_detailpage" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></embed>


Genero36



Joined: 24 Apr 2005
Posts: 9473



Back to top
PostPosted: 08/16/13 2:30 pm    ::: Reply Reply with quote

<embed><iframe width="640" height="360" frameborder="0" scrolling="no" src="http://www.oprah.com/common/omplayer_embed.html?article_id=44867"></iframe></embed>


Genero36



Joined: 24 Apr 2005
Posts: 9473



Back to top
PostPosted: 08/17/13 1:01 am    ::: Reply Reply with quote

I will be bump this thread and edit the title right before Fix My Life comes on tonight, as a reminder.


Genero36



Joined: 24 Apr 2005
Posts: 9473



Back to top
PostPosted: 08/17/13 7:58 pm    ::: Reply Reply with quote

Bump.


missjoy28



Joined: 01 Sep 2005
Posts: 6107
Location: Chicago, IL


Back to top
PostPosted: 08/17/13 11:24 pm    ::: Reply Reply with quote

I'm watching it now!



_________________
EDD for President!
coffy73



Joined: 24 Sep 2009
Posts: 2592



Back to top
PostPosted: 08/17/13 11:47 pm    ::: Reply Reply with quote

With some of Iyanla's celebrity guests, it's more "Iyanla get me on tv" than "Fix my life", not Chamique, but others. That said, I've never trusted Vanzant and I just see this as just another reality show that's masking as a serious life fix. Something like this should be done privately, not airing all your family's dirty laundry and issues for the world to gawk over. My aunt was watching this the other day and it featured a family trying to "fix" their problems and I was wondering how much money are they getting for doing this and is it really a fix or just to get on tv?


Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic    RebKell's Junkie Boards Forum Index » WNBA All times are GMT - 5 Hours
Goto page 1, 2  Next
Page 1 of 2

 
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum


Powered by phpBB 2.0.17 © 2001- 2004 phpBB Group
phpBB Template by Vjacheslav Trushkin