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dtsnms
Joined: 23 Sep 2004
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 Posted: 07/14/05 2:58 pm ::: Support Blue Secession! |
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Dear Red States,
We are ticked off at the way you have treated California, and we have decided we are leaving. We intend to form our own country, and we are taking the other Blue States with us.
In case you are not aware, that includes Hawaii, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois and the entire Northeast. We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, and especially to the people of the new country of New California.
To sum up briefly: You get Texas, Oklahoma and all the slave states. We get stem cell research and the best beaches. We get Elliot Spitzer. You get Ken Lay.
We get the Statue of Liberty. You get Opry Land. We get Intel and Microsoft. You get WorldCom. We get Harvard. You get Ole' Miss.
We get 85 percent of America's venture capital and entrepreneurs. You get Alabama.
We get two-thirds of the tax revenue, and you get to make the red states pay their fair share.
Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than the Christian Coalition's, we get a bunch of happy families. You get a bunch of over-worked single moms.
Please be aware that Nuevo California will be pro-choice and anti-war, and we are going to want all our citizens back from Iraq at once. If you need people to fight, ask your evangelicals. They have kids they are apparently willing to send to their deaths for no purpose, and they do not care if you do not show pictures of their children's caskets coming home.
We do wish you success in Iraq, and hope that the WMDs turn up, but we are not willing to spend our resources in Bush's Quagmire.
With the Blue States in hand, we will have firm control of 80 percent of the country's fresh water, more than 90 percent of the pineapples and lettuce, 92 percent of the nation's fresh fruit, 95 percent of America's quality wines (you can serve French wines at state dinners) 90 percent of all cheese, 90 percent of the high tech industry, most of the US low-sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and condors, all the Ivy and Seven Sister schools, plus Harvard, Yale, Stanford, Cal Tech and MIT.
With the Red States, on the other hand, you will have to cope with 88 percent of all obese Americans (and their projected health care costs), 92 percent of all US mosquitoes, nearly 100 percent of the tornadoes, 90 percent of the hurricanes, 99 percent of all Southern Baptists, virtually 100 percent of all televangelists, Rush Limbaugh, Bob Jones University, Clemson and the University of Georgia.
We get the Philadelphia Museum of Art and Yosemite. Thank you!
Additionally, 38 percent of those in the Red states believe Jonah was actually swallowed by a whale, 62 percent believe life is sacred unless we are discussing the death penalty or gun laws, 44 percent say that evolution is only a theory, 53 percent believe that Saddam was involved in 9/11 and 61 percent of you crazy bastards believe you are people with higher morals than we lefties.
By the way, we are taking the good pot, too. You can have that dirt weed they grow in Mexico.
Sincerely,
True Blue States of New California
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pilight
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| Posted: 07/14/05 3:28 pm ::: |
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Not all those figures are accurate, but even if they were you must note that the blue states will have no oil. You'll be paying $10 or more per gallon for gas. Add in the extra cost from not being able to truck or train your goods from the west to the east, it will all have to fly or get shipped around the southern tip of SA (we get the canal), and your economy will crash within the first two years of the split.
Anyway, this sort of post just underlines the intolerance of blue state America. They just can't stand anyone that doesn't think like they do.
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thesixthwoman
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Queenie
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| Posted: 07/14/05 3:34 pm ::: |
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This is why the United States of Canada plan works slightly better. At least that way we can go north for shipping.
There is, however, one small problem with any blue-state secession, and I can't believe no one's brought it up. Hello! We're abandoning four WNBA franchises!
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caune
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herrade
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| Posted: 07/14/05 3:43 pm ::: |
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| Queenie wrote: |
| This is why the United States of Canada plan works slightly better. |
yes! with the MASSIVE oil reserves in the tar fields of alberta now worth processing, i'd much rather be part of canada than the republic of texas. canada will surpass saudi arabia as the leading exporter of oil in the next ten years.
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dtsnms
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thesixthwoman
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jammerbirdi
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| Posted: 07/14/05 4:32 pm ::: |
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| pilight wrote: |
Not all those figures are accurate, but even if they were you must note that the blue states will have no oil. You'll be paying $10 or more per gallon for gas. Add in the extra cost from not being able to truck or train your goods from the west to the east, it will all have to fly or get shipped around the southern tip of SA (we get the canal), and your economy will crash within the first two years of the split.
Anyway, this sort of post just underlines the intolerance of blue state America. They just can't stand anyone that doesn't think like they do. |
How do Red State and Proud of It people think?
See in our part of the world we'd elect politicians that would work to dramatically cut our dependence on burning filthy stinking oil just to get ourselves from one place to the next. Without the republicans shilling for the oil and auto industry we'd get some environmentally responsible policies and plans._________________ Every woman who has ever been presented with a career/sex quid pro quo in the entertainment industry should come forward and simply say, “Me, too.” - jammer The New York Times 10/10/17 |
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pilight
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| Posted: 07/14/05 5:07 pm ::: |
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| jammerbirdi wrote: |
| See in our part of the world we'd elect politicians that would work to dramatically cut our dependence on burning filthy stinking oil just to get ourselves from one place to the next. Without the republicans shilling for the oil and auto industry we'd get some environmentally responsible policies and plans. |
Is that what president Schwarzenegger would do? Or are you talking about a return to the days of Pete Wilson or Ronald Reagan or Richard Nixon or...
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caune
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jammerbirdi
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| Posted: 07/14/05 5:33 pm ::: |
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| pilight wrote: |
| jammerbirdi wrote: |
| See in our part of the world we'd elect politicians that would work to dramatically cut our dependence on burning filthy stinking oil just to get ourselves from one place to the next. Without the republicans shilling for the oil and auto industry we'd get some environmentally responsible policies and plans. |
Is that what president Schwarzenegger would do? Or are you talking about a return to the days of Pete Wilson or Ronald Reagan or Richard Nixon or... |
Or Diane Feinstien or Barbara Boxer or Jerry and Pat Brown.
Who put GWB in office? I'd take Nixon for Life if it could undo the eight years of this administration because this is the worst political leadership on any level and at any time we've ever seen in this country.
Karl Rove is the Spawn of Satan. GWB is a DEVIL._________________ Every woman who has ever been presented with a career/sex quid pro quo in the entertainment industry should come forward and simply say, “Me, too.” - jammer The New York Times 10/10/17 |
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KeiraNY
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Admiral_Needa
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bigsportzbabe
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| Posted: 07/15/05 12:57 pm ::: |
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| Quote: |
Blue states are supposed to be known for their tolerance, yet some people in those states are just as Pilight described: intolerant of anyone that doesn't think like they do. That hypocrisy is disappointing...
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All in favor of banishing Admiral Needy to red states, please raise your hand
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pilight
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| Posted: 07/15/05 12:58 pm ::: |
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| Admiral_Needa wrote: |
| Blue states are supposed to be known for their tolerance |
Most people that talk about tolerance are much more interested in being tolerated than they are in tolerating.
No small surprise that the population is fleeing the northeast to the west and south.
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Admiral_Needa
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Admiral_Needa
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KeiraNY
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| Posted: 07/15/05 1:21 pm ::: |
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Yeah it's called old people fleeing for arthritis relief!
I have no problem with people who are different than I am or think differently. In fact, I welcome it! Different ideas are part of what makes you learn. However, I RESENT being told what is right for me and how I should live my life. Some people in those red states think blue states have no morals (which I will touch upon later) and that we're a bunch of heathens. Nothing could be further from the truth. We are not as set in meddling in other people's bedrooms or how they live their lives. We kinda have a 'to each his/her own' mentality which MANY (notice I didn't say all) people in the red states have. Their "issues" are gay marriage and abortion. Nothing else matters! We don't care about that. We care about government, education, poverty, unemployment, etc.
Back to my morals point....morality is relative. We were ALL raised in different backgrounds, states/countries and religions. Does that mean that I'm better than the lot of you (or vice versa)??? No! It means we are different and have different experieneces. Nothing more!
With that in mind, why can't people live & let live? It's VERY simple and much less agonizing!
| pilight wrote: |
| Admiral_Needa wrote: |
| Blue states are supposed to be known for their tolerance |
Most people that talk about tolerance are much more interested in being tolerated than they are in tolerating.
No small surprise that the population is fleeing the northeast to the west and south. |
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peaceplease
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bigsportzbabe
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| Posted: 07/15/05 1:30 pm ::: |
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| Quote: |
Most people that talk about tolerance are much more interested in being tolerated than they are in tolerating.
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Is it me.....am I the only one who has a problem with the concept of "TOLERANCE"! ( a decidedly red state concept)
to me it suggest that even though I feel that you are not worthy of equality, I will endure your existance because I`m forced to.
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Senility Prayer: God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference. Amen.
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caune
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| Posted: 07/15/05 1:43 pm ::: |
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| bigsportzbabe wrote: |
| Quote: |
Most people that talk about tolerance are much more interested in being tolerated than they are in tolerating.
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Is it me.....am I the only one who has a problem with the concept of "TOLERANCE"! ( a decidedly red state concept)
to me it suggest that even though I feel that you are not worthy of equality, I will endure your existance because I`m forced to. |
Right on sportsbabe!
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pilight
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| Posted: 07/15/05 1:46 pm ::: |
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| Quote: |
| Is it me.....am I the only one who has a problem with the concept of "TOLERANCE"! ( a decidedly red state concept) |
You're the first person I've heard suggest that tolerance is a red state concept. Mostly I hear blue staters talking about how intolerant red staters are.
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| to me it suggest that even though I feel that you are not worthy of equality, I will endure your existance because I`m forced to. |
Here in America we believe that everyone is created equal. Since you apparently don't believe that, perhaps you would be happier elsewhere. There are many countries with ingrained policies and cultures that foster inequality for you to choose from.
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sbjules
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Admiral_Needa
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Electricity would be costly too because of the lack of power plants. California would probably have to switch to Nuclear Power, and would have to dump the radioactive waste here instead of Nevada. 
